(This article was taken from the printed February Magazine - contact us to be added to the mailing list.)
TO HAVE AND TO HIDE
It is astounding how many couple’s get into bed with someone that they don’t even know…financially speaking, that is. Although, it’s really no surprise that financial secrets have led to the destruction of so many marriages when you consider that a large part of today’s society views financial
infidelity as being just as harmful as sexual infidelity.
In a recent study, 36% of men and 40% of women confess that they had at one time or another lied to their spouse about the price of something they bought or outright side-stepped a purchase all together. And it doesn’t stop there. Hidden bank accounts, credit cards, loans from their 401K’s, collections, even taking out home equity loans without telling their partner in life are all contributors that have led to financial tensions in so many relationships. Not only can hiding purchases be bad for a couple’s emotional relationship, it can also lead couples down the wrong path financially and in the opposite direction of their snowball.
infidelity as being just as harmful as sexual infidelity.
In a recent study, 36% of men and 40% of women confess that they had at one time or another lied to their spouse about the price of something they bought or outright side-stepped a purchase all together. And it doesn’t stop there. Hidden bank accounts, credit cards, loans from their 401K’s, collections, even taking out home equity loans without telling their partner in life are all contributors that have led to financial tensions in so many relationships. Not only can hiding purchases be bad for a couple’s emotional relationship, it can also lead couples down the wrong path financially and in the opposite direction of their snowball.
FOR BETTER, FOR WOR$E
Fortunately, many couples that take the plunge, agree that working through this difficult topic to find a solution together is the best course of action… no matter how uncomfortable it is. People hide their dirty little money secrets to cover up all kinds of embarrassing reasons from addictions to compulsive shopping habits. But studies have shown that those that open up about their finances early in their relationship have a better chance of survival.
It’s proven that those that make the time to talk about their finances as a couple, embrace each other’s pasts, and work together to develop a strategy that works for both, find the best financial success over those that ignore issues and let them build to unsurmountable proportions. Those that dream together AND take individual responsibility (i.e. stop blaming) find that amazing things start to happen. Shared success in the relationship not only in the financial realm, but other pursuits as well!
It’s proven that those that make the time to talk about their finances as a couple, embrace each other’s pasts, and work together to develop a strategy that works for both, find the best financial success over those that ignore issues and let them build to unsurmountable proportions. Those that dream together AND take individual responsibility (i.e. stop blaming) find that amazing things start to happen. Shared success in the relationship not only in the financial realm, but other pursuits as well!
'TIL DEBT DO WE PART
As one last little tidbit to round out this kiss-and-tell, it’s important to note that financial discussions are NOT something to check off the list and never return to. It may not be as sexy as other topics of conversation, but it is CRITICAL that the financial health of the relationship continues to be nurtured and grow over the years through consistent communication, and help from your coaches when needed. Continue to work on overcoming the dark days of debt together and don’t lose sight of your dreams.
Work with your partner in life and find a renewed sense of drive and determination as you strive together to live the life that you dream of… and deserve.
Work with your partner in life and find a renewed sense of drive and determination as you strive together to live the life that you dream of… and deserve.